This is a personal learning experience that I want to share with you today about letting go and growing up. I realised that I was a hindrance to my own personal growth by holding on to hurts, negative feeling, pain and loss. This resulted in me becoming ill-tempered and sulky, I was hard to reach out to and most of all not company that people wanted to hang out with. I was cocooned within myself and and all I thought about was myself and how pitiable I was. Wow! to think of it now, those dark days are behind me and I can laugh in pain, let go of anything and talk to people as though it never meant anything.. actually you learn to forgive and get over stuff.. for your sake and not for others.
My first lesson was - I hurt my own growth by holding things against others - justified or not. I was making myself miserable. I did not enjoy my life as I should. You think it is worth it.. I am sure you don’t , so did I when I came to that point of realization.. It did not take me long to change after that.
You could complain all day and have people avoid you or just let your hair down and enjoy the moment with the people around you.. if you are carrying heavy baggage from the past you can’t really enjoy the moment and maybe even can’t stop complaining. The better choice was to have fun.. and I did just that. Get a positive attitude and live life positively.
No one enjoys the company of a person who is volatile, temperamental, sulks, is negative or always angry. Hey, forget the others you don’t like yourself if you realize it. Learning to be positive takes time, but is helpful in the long run. You can achieve much by being positive than negative, this was a hard learning but it did come by .. slowly but surely. It was a struggle alright.
Grieving is essential when you face a major loss, but we need to get over it sooner than later. Life goes on and we need to move on. Guilt and fear of what people would think is what keeps most people in mourning, remember to live your life as those others have done.
Forgive, sounds really altruistic, but it can sometimes be a selfish action. When you forgive someone you give yourself permission to move on, and you help yourself more than you help the other. Forgiving erases deep hurts or pain in your psyche and in turn allows you to be less bitter, more positive and think highly of yourself. This is the reason why I called it selfish. Forgive so you can forget pain and hurt and move on. You could move lightly with no emotional baggage.
Let go when you have to. Some people never let you grow. You need to know when to let go and let go. Let them face their own battles and not make you a victim of their problems.
Ignore - sometime we just need to ignore comments. Some people have only that much class that they cannot behave in any other way. They deserve to be ignored. But there are others with whom you need to be assertive, inform them that you do not take kindly to all that they say, at least they will be careful when you are around.
Move on - this is the most important factor for your growth. Do not get stuck with what people say and do, it is their choice. Maturity is to move on and not let other people dictate to your emotions or feeling of wellness . You need to be the master of your destiny, your feelings and life.
Respond don’t react. When we respond we use our rational and logical part of the brain, but when we react we do so from our emotions. Emotional reaction are often not the best responses, so make sure when you respond to someone think through it and decide if you are going to react in a way that would stop your grow or you move on no matter what. Let go .
Have a wonderful day...and bloom in every area and aspect of your life.